Scared to Meet You, Larry

       Greetings readers. I hope you enjoy this excerpt from my recently-released book, Mornings with Larry: Life Lessons from a Man in a Wheelchair. The book is available on Amazon https://www.amazon.com
       This excerpt, from the first few pages of chapter one, gives a brief intro of who Larry is, and how I came to be his morning caregiver. I hope it blesses you—

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1

SCARED TO MEET YOU, LARRY

The church dinner drew to an end. I swallowed a last bit of carrot cake and glanced past several heads toward the man in the wheelchair. An uncomfortable thought surfaced: It’s about time you introduced yourself.
I took a deep breath, got up from the table and approached him.
“Hello, Larry,” I said, extending my right hand. “I’m Tom. It’s good to meet you.”
He looked up at me and smiled. “Hi Tom.”
His fingers barely moved and his forearm remained fixed on the wheelchair armrest. An awkward moment passed—time enough for me to realize his disability affected more than just his legs. I grasped his limp right hand and shook it for the both of us.

Larry in May 2004. Hands/arms still working.

He continued, “I’ve seen you in church [pause for breath], but haven’t had a chance to [pause for breath] talk to you.”
Actually, I’d done my best to avoid him, probably due to my shyness and being overly focused on his disability. I had yet to realize Larry’s flesh-and-blood human status.
      Our first conversation was brief and I was distracted by his frequent mid-sentence pauses for breath. The thought of conversing with a disabled person frostbit my brain. When the encounter ended, I walked back to my seat with a sigh of relief.
If it had been up to me, I’d never have taken our relationship beyond that obligatory greeting. But God sometimes bypasses our unwilling hearts and places us in situations we wouldn’t venture to on our own.
That first meeting occurred in 2008 at McKenzie Bible Fellowship in the community of Vida, Oregon. Larry, his wife, Ann, and their teenaged daughter, Paige, had recently joined our church. They soon became fixtures each Sunday morning, claiming three spots in the left front row as their own. Occasionally, their son Ryan took a break from his studies at Oregon State University, ninety minutes away, and traveled home to join them.
Two and a half years earlier, in August of 2005, Larry had resigned his pastorate at Valley Hills Community Church in Springfield, Oregon. The debilitating symptoms of multiple sclerosis (MS) had progressed to the point where he felt he needed to make that hard decision. He describes his condition at that time, “I still had quite a bit of movement in my arms, but no movement in my legs. And I didn’t have any problem with my eyes. So I could still preach. But I didn’t feel it was fair to the congregation, because most people didn’t have wheelchair accessibility [in their homes] and I was kind of a hands-on pastor. So I just felt it was time to step aside and let them call a new pastor who could be more involved.”
In 2001, Larry was diagnosed with primary-progressive multiple sclerosis, the fast-developing form of the disease. By January of 2008, when I first met him, MS had left him essentially quadriplegic. He could still control the wheelchair toggle with his right hand. His right eye worked fine, but vision in his left eye was blurred.
The Brownings decided they could reduce stress and save time if they attended a church closer to their home. As a result, those of us at McKenzie Bible Fellowship, just three miles from their house, received a great blessing.
Larry preached one Sunday and shared his life story. He’d worn many hats: Vietnam combat soldier, longhaired hippie, preacher, widower, single dad, and modern-day Job. He preferred delivering Bible-based sermons to talking about himself. But speaking opportunities sometimes accompanied requests that he recount his adventurous life and how God brought him to where he is today.
As days went by, the people at McKenzie Bible Fellowship came to know Larry as a friend and brother in Christ. Having put aside his pastoral title, he fellowshipped as one of the flock. As a sheep, he lived out what he’d preached as a shepherd. His conversation typically focused on Christ and others. He didn’t complain about his severe disability. It became clear to the new church that he was a man of strong, mature faith.
Larry and Ann began showing up at the same midweek Bible study that my wife Denise and I attended. Before long, the group decided to switch the meetings to the Brownings’ home. This gave Ann, a petite woman, a break from the work required to load her husband into the wheelchair van and unload him. The change blessed us all due to Ann’s warm hospitality and tastefully decorated home.
One evening, the Brownings presented a prayer request at the Bible study. Larry’s morning caregiver, Evan, needed to quit soon. He cared for Larry five mornings per week. Ann cared for her husband Saturday and Sunday mornings, as well as seven afternoons and seven evenings per week. Someone needed to be within earshot of Larry at all times. The Bible-study group prayed for a replacement for Evan.
More than a month passed and the position was still open. The Lord nudged my heart to pursue the job. I felt little enthusiasm. Caregiving? Ugh. The idea made me squeamish. On the other hand, I needed morning work to supplement my plant nursery business. So when I asked Ann and Larry for the job, I did my best to mask these mixed feelings. In July 2009, they hired me—for better or worse.